Friday Night In

Here I sit..
in front of the pc..
me still wrapped in my towel...

"do i bathe or not?"
Its cold, but I do have a water heater...
My hair would get all wet, but I do have a towel..
Its the middle of the night (or morning), but I do smell of sweat...

Hmmm.. a tough choice to make.

I've been in my towel for about an hour..
constantly tugging at it for Giant only sells stupid small assed towels!!!
Come on?!
One size fits all my arse..
They should put a sign
"WARNING: towels may appear bigger before buying, towels may or may not cover all your boobs & butt"

I start to wander off as I stare at the lifeless screen..
back to the time where I would tell myself..
"I'm gonna study tonight! FOR REAL!"
My buku rujukan would be wide open in front of me..
I'd look at the text as it slowly transforms into pictures..
Pictures of cartoons, tv series, BSB.. "ahhh Nick Carter I Love you!"
What ever, you name it, I've dreamt of it..

I remember one time, I was looking at the word "isi kandungan"
my mind was a total blank!
Serious.. I wasn't even dreaming about anything..
It was just empty..for about an hour or so..
Kochai broke the spell when he knocked on my door to tempt me into some late night snacking.

Kochai: "You prepare the goodies! I'll take care of the movie"
I'd get all upset and fight.
Toy : "why cant you prepare the supper? I'll prep up the movie"
Kochai : "because I rewind a tape better than you (back then all VCR ma) & I can choose a 'cun cun mari' movie, you can't.."
Point well taken.

Its true that I could never really decide anything for myself.
It was always "go with the flow" or "a smart person doesn't go against the tide of the crowd"
The question I hate the most is "What you want to eat?"
My answer would always be "anything.." or "up to you"
I could never make a suggestion or decision.

One would notice that in every single post that I publish,
I seem to be dragging on about everything and nothing..
I'd start out normal, and end up talking about something else..
Just like this one..hahaha

Kochai says that:
I'm fickle minded.
I have no back bone.
I have no character.
I have no personality.

When I do think about it..I believe what he says is true.
I have no personality of my own.
I'm always adapting to my surroundings, never the other way around.
But it does have its advantages.
I'm able to join in any group that I choose to,
be it the book worm, the science geeks, the lalas, the bums, the wee ones, the old folks (my specialty), the gangsters, the machans, the cool, the uncool, the educated, the illiterate, the wise cracks, the lamers... I guess the list goes on a long way..
Its like I'm a blood sucking mosquito, any blood will do...
I'm like the cockroach, adapting to the environment
( But cockroaches do survive through everything.. so.."Cockroach : 1 - Joy : 0" )
or an octopus.. just that I've not evolved enough to change color. hehe
that would be super cool!

I'd like to think I have split personalities.
But with a split like that?
GOD DAMNNNN WOMAN..
how many ways you wanna split la??

I'm like a bowl of jello.
You think you can see right through me,
but theres small bits and pieces in me that you don't see.
You think you know what I taste like,
but theres no way of ever knowing till you take a bite.
You think that I'll always be sweet,
but it all depends on what type of toppings I want to add on.

I'm just being me.
I choose to show you who I want you to see in me.
Sorta like Mystique in Xmen. haha

Its kinda hard when people ask you whats your favourite this & that.
I don't really have a favourite whatever..
I guess it would be easier if they asked me what I don't like & what I do.

Lets see..

1. I don't like to borrow.
2. I don't like it when my feet gets wet in the rain.
3. I don't like adultry or adulterers.
4. I don't like seeing weird textures, example: unscrapped scales on a fish after its been fried!
5. I don't like it when I can't fix a problem on my own.
6. I don't like it when I order a telur mata kerbau and it comes served to me all cooked.
7. I don't like it when I'm wrong when I absolutely thought I was right.
8. I don't like it when I'm told I'm wrong when I absolutely thought I was right.

and...

1. I love shoes.
2. I love mushrooms.
3. I love animals.
4. I love writing nonsense.
5. I love frankie valli songs
6. I love boring musicals.
   
7. I love green & purple.
8. I love daydreaming.

Sigh, I just realised I should better get going if I want to take that bath.
Esok ada kerja...CURSE YOU WORKING SATURDAYS!

I'm Sorry if I just wasted your time again.
Wait a minute, No.. No I'm not.. haha..

I'm just being me..
Exactly what I know not myself..