Kena Saman Lagi..

There's a certain time in a girls' life where they'd start to think about marriage.
I shudder at the thought of it...

It starts when your girl friends start to get married one by one..
The conversation always end with the sentence "Whens your turn ah??"
My answer would always be "CHOIIII"
Then they'd ignore me and continue to blabber "you know la now not young edi..when wanna get married? when you're 40 meh? then baby leh?.......la la la la la la see me..la la la see me.."
I put my gift of blocking out irritating voices to good use..
"Thanks mummy for helping me develop this skill at a young age with your constant nagging!"

Urghh please don't ask me this question.
I'm so freaked out about marriage right now.
I do want to get married one day..
I just don't want to think about it right now.
Let me focus on what I can achieve before I try to think about settling down.
And, I think if I do get married, I only want a selection of my best friends to be there,
of course my dearest family members, closest relatives, and Bubbles too if she's still alive.
So sorry, you YI MA GU JEH can all piss off...
If you like weddings so much, you get married yourself..hahahahahahah

I've got my heart broken one time too many.
I don't deny I've had my share of breaking hearts as well..
Which I would really like to apologize if only i had the guts to.
"I'm sorry, I really am..."
But as I always say..
"There's no saint without a past, no sinner without a future."
I've changed. I'm still trying.

The worst thing about getting your heart broken,
is when its not that he has found someone new..
"That... That, I can forgive."
For I know Love knows no boundaries, Love has no reason, Love is Just.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
I'd be heart broken still, but time heals all.
Its the deception and lies.
What good is a relationship without trust.
Being the stubborn Taurus that I am, I just cannot let it go.
Sigh, I know la I'm not perfect myself...

Back to marriage.
Don't get me wrong.
I'm all for it, just not for myself... yet

I've seen friend after friend get preggie,
think about abortion but doesn't go through with it,
and ends with marriage.
After having the baby,
they complain that they don't love their husbands, or the other way around,
how the baby ruined their life,
that the baby was all a mistake, and they wish they could turn back time,
and think of all the things they could have done with their lives, if only...

jou ji jao mou hak yi. (direct translation : if you knew earlier there wouldn't be beggars)

Well, you know what?
A baby is never a mistake.
A baby is born sin free.
You are the mistake!
You ruined your own life!
You Could have prevented this mess with 5 bucks or less.
Now look what you have gotten yourself into?

Case after case of family problems.
News of divorce.
Pray that only tears are shed.. and nothing more.

Why?
To be married to one man your whole life,
to find out he's got another wife on the other side of the country,
or a girlfriend who's even younger than your very own daughter,
or worse still, GAY.

Why?
To be married to one woman your whole life,
to find out she's been sleeping with every Tom Dick & Harry,
that she only married you for your money,
or worse still, .. hmm..wait i think thats it... I cant think of anything else hahaha

I come from a messy family.
The only good that came from it is.. life, my brother, my friends, my cool relatives.
Besides that, alot of things were really painful.
I've learnt to keep it inside, well hidden from the outside world.
Its the only way to show that you've got a PERFECT family.

Love is a temporary madness.
It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides.
And when it subsides you have to make a decision.
You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part.
Because this is what love is.
Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement,
it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.
That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away,
and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.
When you have it, you have roots that grow towards each other underground,
and when all the pretty blossom has fallen from your branches
you find that you are but one tree, not two.

Gosh look where I've gone to again. XP

So till the day you receive my wedding invitation, (not anytime soon!!)
know this..
I've put alot of thought into it,
I'm not inviting you to fill the seats,
You're here because I really want you to be,
Because you're someone special to me.
Because your pressence makes a difference.